As I sit on my inflatable ball stretching and bouncing to get my exercise I remember my youth. I remember wondering why my grandmother walked slowly and why did she wear such large dresses? And her stockings were held up with what looked like rubber bands. Then I remember my mother, vibrant, beautiful and a spitfire. No one could take her down or her hope for the future away. Her wish was for her three children and the one she gave away would find happiness, be healthy, and love life. Through her short life, she lost her sparkle, her smile, her figure, and her lovely voice. She lost her hope and at one time her faith. My mother shared with me shortly before she passed away, to get educated. “Because no one can take that away from you.” I thought about what my mother shared with me and earned my Master’s degree in 2006, I remember thinking, now what? Now what do I do? What did my mother mean to tell me? Was it a gift? Or just another one of her tactics to live through my life. My mother passed on shortly after– at 52 years old. And as I sit in my home in San Diego, CA waiting for 2014, I wonder if my mother would have been proud? Shocked? or Disappointed?
Turning 50 next year has also given me my reflection in the mirror and to see myself in my mother’s eyes. There are days my body lets me down, my resilience broken, my spirit lays to rest however my mind is sharp. My mind, my past, my education, and my determination tells me everyday…”It always gets better”.
My brothers have gone their own way and me my own. My children are grown yet like any mother, I constantly worry about them and wish I could have done things differently. As we close for 2013, I have put all my faith, energies and health into Media PRO Productions and what it stands for. My vision for Media PRO was to provide opportunities to those who needed someone to believe in them, learn new skills, see life through a lens and create amazing videos. I feel we have done that and much more. However, it always seemed something was lacking. What area did I not think about? What person did I not add to the Circle of Helping Hands? Something, someone was missing. When I came across this video, I knew the story they shared was exactly what I have been trying to say all along.
This is for my mother, Nora Miranda…Because we are all perfect, just the way we are.